I call it
editing but really it's a case of procrastinating and putting off the
painful re-read and the butchering of my initial words. Although
they're very special to me I am not under the impression that they
are perfect; I love my story but I definitely know that my grammar
and syntax leave a lot to be desired.
One
wonderful friend once said to me
'What has
the comma ever done to you?'
At the
time I thought she was being a bit picky, the fullstops were helping
to create tension right? WRONG. Hindsight is a wonderful thing.
Whilst I was editing the first six chapters I laughed a lot; in some
cases I was right and the short snappy sentences helped with pacing
and drama buuuuuut most of the time it just made the writing
seem really immature and under developed.
I've
always had an interesting relationship with grammar. I was in all the
top sets at school but for some reason I just didn't absorb those
useful lessons about the English Language. All the way through uni
I'd have lecturers comment that my syntax needed improvement and I
completely ignored it because I didn't know what it was. REALLY
STUPID! I was daft enough to look at it and go 'huh?' and then put
the considered and constructive criticism aside and forget all about
it next time I wrote something. I am proud to say that in my Masters
year I finally asked my Dad (my own personal editor) and I now
understand what syntax is. Sadly, I'm still crap at it.
Is any
first time writer ever comfortable with the idea of letting someone
else read their book purely to pick holes in it? To have someone just
read it to identify each and every mistake? To point out how you have
failed with nearly all the basic language techniques (I say 'nearly
all' because I am still hopeful that the years of my Dad editing my
work has had some impact on my writing technique)?
Unfortunately
I know that one day I will have to hand my book over to somebody for
the sole reason of finding all the mistakes I have made. BUT for now
I am hiding from grammar and syntax and focusing on the storyline and
making it the absolute best it can be; mainly trying to fix the holes
in the plot and to redefine the world more effectively. Excitingly,
this means that I get to write whole new sections and develop
characters and their plot lines more fully which, means that I get to
spend lots of time in the world that spent so much time creating.
Although
editing can be a scary process it does mean that I get to disappear
into my own thoughts and justify the glazed look that my friends and
family have come to know so well.
